It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
