I must be too annoying 4 u.
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
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