This girl is more easily done than said...
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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