she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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