just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
