Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
