So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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