I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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