"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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