dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
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