I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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