It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
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