The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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