That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Randomize
