apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize