I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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