I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
