I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
