The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
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