that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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