it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
This is classic penis vs brain.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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