At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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