And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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