yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
