either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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