I bet he comes in French.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
