rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
