Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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