what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I think im going to throw up on grandma
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
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