I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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