I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize