That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
