omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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