no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
