my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
