Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
