Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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