We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
