who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
drinking out of a sandbucket again
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
