your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
