Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
