We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
