one might say we're banned from that church
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
