no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
