I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
