when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
