Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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