yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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