I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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