I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
