I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
